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Do you have days when you feel stuck or lost in a given situation? What about moments you have a problem to solve or a task to accomplish, but your “creativity tank” feels empty? There are times all of us simply cannot see the answer, or we are unable to figure out the right path to take in a circumstance. In these moments we need an example, a person in “live time” who can model what we should do. 

Of the four levels inside the brain’s right hemispheric control center, an entire level is dedicated to learning by seeing an example. Simply, we need someone to show us what to do opposed to telling us what to do. Here is where lectures, videos, books and yes, even blogs, fall short of equipping the emotional brain.

I feel blessed to have been introduced to the 19 relational skills with the opportunity to use these skills with my sons and husband. Even with the skills, there are still times I feel unsure how to correctly address a problem or situation. These are golden moments I need someone to show me what to do. My brain requires a person to demonstrate what step and what approach I should take. I need someone who has traveled this road before me to help me express my values and character in a new way.

I have learned much over the years from friends and mentors who have shared stories of their journey. Many of these people have spoken into my life. I find great comfort receiving encouragement, stories, and guidance from others. This gift reminds me I am not alone in my struggles. It is through the sharing of wisdom that I have gained much insight and perspective. Those with more life experience offer me a gift that I cannot give myself.

A few years ago, Chris and I attended a weekend Alive & Well Parenting with Joy workshop. We enjoyed learning from other parents, grandparents, and educators who are working to apply important, brain-friendly principles with the children in their lives. After the weekend workshop, we felt inspired and equipped with encouragement and fresh ideas for applying the skills with our sons. I encourage all my readers to visit the Alive & Well website (http://alivewell.org/product/product-parenting-with-joy/) for excellent resources, including a recording of some of the workshop sessions.

This brings me to the million-dollar question: Where do you need an example? Where do you need a friend or a mentor, someone who has been down this path before you? Here is a person that can encourage, inspire and guide you along in your journey as a parent, spouse, friend, colleague, and more. I pray for God to bring a face or name to mind that you should reach out to today.

Posted in Parenting

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  1. Mary

    I especially love this post, Jen! Thank you so much for this wonderful reminder! (And for the resource.) I always thought you should do a parenting workshop or video series on YouTube. I have 2 girls 5 yrs and under, and always feel inspired and joy-filled when I read your posts.

  2. Melody

    I am a single Mom of two adult children both active military. Since my divorce 2 1/2 years ago, I have found it a great struggle to maintain joy. I am praying for God to show me who my mentor is for this phase of my life.
    Thank you for your words of encouragement.

    • Jen Coursey

      Melody, I am praying with you for God to provide a mentor and to restore your joy in this difficult season.

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